I'm a bit late writing this review, but.......
Iron Maiden is back. Not only is Iron Maiden back, but they’re here, for the first time. Rather, they will be here on March 17th. Those of you who want to go but haven’t bought your tickets, please visit www.ticketpro.in. I’m not so sure about the availability of the tickets.

Anyway, the show is part of their “A Matter of Life and Death tour”. The tour revolves around their 14th Studio Album – A Matter of Life and Death. There was much excitement amongst fans because this was Maiden’s 14th studio album, twice the number of Maiden’s 7th album – Seventh Son of a Seventh Son. Rumours had it that this was going to be a Conceptual Album, but it is not.

The album cover seems pretty cheesy to me, but it is certainly better than its predecessor – Dance of Death. Eddie standing atop a tank with zombie skeleton warriors isn’t my idea of a great album cover, but Maiden has never been known for good album covers.

The album starts off with the song Different World, that’s when it strikes me, “Damn, Maiden has done another Dance of Death.” It isn’t so; the first song somehow reminds me of Wildest Dreams from the Dance of Death album. This is probably because I find both songs to be poor album openers compared to the other album openers. It is certainly not in the same range as that of Moonchild or Caught Somewhere in Time. Don’t get me wrong. I think the song is quite catchy, a sing along type chorus. I just didn’t think it is the perfect song to put as the album opener.

The second song, well, it never aroused much interest, one of two songs in the album which I rarely listen to and skip most of the time. “These Colors Don’t Run” is a quote from Bruce Dickinson’s rant in 2005 at Ozzfest after the Egg throwing incident. Well, the song doesn’t have anything to do with eggs or Ozzy or Sharon Osbourne even. The song describes a soldiers feelings as he is about to leave for war and gives his view of why he joined the army. The line “For the passion, for the money, for the glory, for the memory” clearly indicates that.

Brighter than a thousand suns, well, the song title itself is a line from Judas Priest’s Painkiller. And the song is mind blowing. This album is pretty much about long songs, three of them clocking over 8 minutes. Brighter than a thousand suns is one of them. The song is about the nuclear bomb. The explosion obviously is what resembles the light from a thousand suns. The lyrics of the song are good, but not great. All in all, BTATS is a song that clearly defines the album.

The pilgrim follows next, with riffs and melodies that remind me of the sands of Arabia. I suppose that’s what it is supposed to do, because The Pilgrim seems to be about the Templar Knights or at least set in a period of religious turmoil. We will have to wait for Maiden to confirm that. This is another song with quite a catchy chorus, and Bruce sounds fantastic.

The Longest Day, well, when I first played the song, and heard about a minute of it, I thought, this song is great. I wasn’t disappointed by the rest of the song either because it is fantastic. The song gives a soldier’s thoughts as he sits in the ship, awaiting a landing, probably Normandy. The lyrics, as usual are very realistic and the chorus is something that makes you feel sorry for the soldiers doing an empire’s dirty work

“Sliding, we go, only fear on our side,
To the Edge of the wire
And we rush with the tide
Oh the water is red,
With the blood of the dead
But I’m still alive, pray to god I survive”

Out of the shadows is one of the introspective songs that Maiden put on practically all their albums. We had Rainmaker in Dance of Death and Blood Brothers in Brave New World. The song, like its predecessors on the other albums, does not disappoint. My first thought as I played this song was, “Oh, Bruce has a cold, why is he singing”. I think he does this purposely. What? Sing like he has a cold, you’re asking? No. He’s given the song a particular effect with a nasal twang. I know it sounds ridiculous to you, but listen to the parts other than the chorus, it doesn’t sound like the Bruce singing on the other songs.

The Reincarnation of Benjamin Breeg, well with a name like that you’d think the song was crap. You’re absolutely right. The song is pretty stereotyped. A Dave Murray written song, clearly realized thanks to the bluesy intro. The song was the first single from the album, quite a poor choice for a single. I wasn’t too enthusiastic about the album after I heard the song. Anyway, don’t get prejudiced about Dave Murray’s songwriting capabilities, he was the one who wrote Brave New World, Charlotte the Harlot, and Judas be my Guide. A poor effort this one though, the main riff is pretty ordinary and the lyrics seem to be the only saving grace. Who is Benjamin Breeg? God knows. If you want to know, ask Bruce when he comes down. If you’re going for the concert, start a chant “Who is Benjamin Breeg, who is Benjamin Breeg.”

For the greater good of God is a song that clock over nine minutes. The song is written by Steve Harris, it doesn’t take a genius to figure that out though. That’s because the song has got a bass intro, all Maiden songs with bass intros are written by Steve Harris (almost). The song itself is about religious wars. About how many people kill in the name of religion, and glorify themselves.

“A wolf in sheep’s clothing
Or Saintly or Sinner
Or some that would believe
A Holy War Winner”

The song is a typical Harris type song, and features a three guitar solo duel, which in my opinion is fantastic.

Lord of Light is the next song according to the album sleeve, and it is brilliant. I loved it from the first listen. It is fast, energetic and quite radio friendly. A bit like Wicker Man from Brave New World except that it is longer.

The legacy starts with acoustic guitar work and Bruce singing in a strangely eerie way. The song progresses with Harris putting out something different from his normal galloping bass. The song is again 9 minutes, and it is quite good. It is one of the best songs of the album.

Summing up, Maiden has changed nothing. It’s the same basic formula that rode them to success with Killers and The Number of the Beast. The only thing that has possibly changed is the fact that they are putting out longer songs, songs that clock over 7 minimum. This I think is in tune with people who like more progressive music nowadays. It is not progressive metal like Dream Theater or Rush, it is progressive heavy metal of Iron Maiden.

Iron Maiden rarely walks on roads with a lot of traffic. They are not interested in breaking into say, growl vocals, or perform live with an orchestra. Iron Maiden is Iron Maiden, and nothing anyone says or does, is going to change that. People can complain that they rarely change their style of music playing, or they use the same chords in most of their songs. Silly arguments I feel. I listen to Iron Maiden because I want to listen to good old Heavy Metal. If I wanted to listen to complex and progressive songs, I would throw on a Dream Theater or Liquid Tension Experiment disc.

The album is released by EMI and is available for Rs 350 (legally) or free (illegally). Or you can do both, like I did, download the album give it a listen, if you like it, buy it. Iron Maiden doesn’t have much against piracy. Bruce himself said, “Buy it only if you like it.”

“Ticking away, the moments that makes up a dull day”

Dull days always tick slower. It is an unwritten law of nature. Exciting/Fun/Any other day ticks much faster. I wonder why. It is probably psychological, but I’m not a psychologist or a therapist of any sort, so I doubt I should be dwelling on the weirder aspects of that.

Time is actually quite funny an aspect. I mean, do you know it exists unless someone told you how to read the days and how to look at a calendar. As a kid, you were told, “this is the minute hand, that is the second hand and the other is the hour hand”. I used to like the hour hand. It was small. I’m still small.

No seriously though. How do you know time exists? If someone hadn’t told me that time exists, I wouldn’t bother looking into it too much. Let us just say, I wouldn’t have been one of the “great inventors of the world”, even when there was everything left to be invented/discovered.

Discovery; it mostly happens by accident, and then the people who discovered it are revered and honored like Gods. I wish I could discover something. At most when I’m doing a problem in math, oh God, please let me discover that the answer in the text book is wrong. But no, God doesn’t grant me that wish either. I suppose there’s a reason for that. He probably may want me to prove that MATH DOESN’T EXIST!

*Insert funky Chinese Music here*

I have nothing against math. It is just that I could never do it right. I wouldn’t mind doing math if I didn’t have an examination to prepare for. I mean, it is pretty interesting isn’t it. You’ve to use your head a lot. Then again, I wouldn’t mind doing anything so long as I don’t have an exam to prepare for. Accountancy, Business Studies (Commerce, for those who haven’t read the name on the textbook), English (err) or Math, would be so much more fun.

You know what would be an effective way to grade you? Not telling you that they’re grading you and doing it in secret! Ah, that would be great; no one would pass/achieve great things. There would be no achievers and there would be no under achievers. There would just be people.

How I long for a time when people aren’t breaking their necks, just to prove that they’re better than the other person in the world. Actually, I’m not so sure I would want that, because that’s the primary element that keeps sports running.

Would Man U care to finish top in the table if it didn’t matter? No, I don’t think so. So it should be that it matters in sports and doesn’t matter elsewhere. Ah, what a life!

The most wonderful part of every year for me is without doubt, the monsoon. I love it when it rains. It rains almost everywhere in the world, but rain is most beautiful in Kerala.

My earliest memory of the monsoon is as a kid. When we used to get weekends off, on Saturdays, I would come to the front of the house and sit on the chair three times too big for me and stare outside at the downpour. I would prefer not to be disturbed while doing so, and the maid at home used to be a little concerned. I was probably around 5 (the furthest I can remember). How often do you see a five year old sit on the porch and watch the rain?

It used to be fantastic having to go to school in the rain. It gave me an excuse to get wet. Of course, I used to travel to school by an overcrowded auto rickshaw, but I did my best to get wet all the same. I would leave home wearing a new raincoat (I would invariably lose one every year), or with a new umbrella, either mum or dad escorting me to the front gate. Often I used to have my sister with me in the auto, but there was a period when she shifted schools, so I had to travel alone (ironically, there were about 13 people or so squeezed into the auto).

The auto driver would do his best to make sure that we kids wouldn’t get wet. There was a plastic sheet (blue in color and very dirty I might add) which used to cover both the entrance to auto and the “window”. I used to sit near the window because the sheet wouldn’t completely cover the window because up front the driver (his name was Sebastian) would have to stick his hand out occasionally to indicate the direction he was going to go in.

Of course, the most fun part of going to school was gone. The Physical Education period was gone, when we used to run like mad people on to the field and play a game of cricket. We couldn’t play cricket in the rain, and none of us were football crazy. So we used to sit in class and play indoor games, mainly ones that we made up. There was “chess” (not the real thing, but one that involved a 3 by 3 matrix drawn on a book and a few items such as erasers and sharpeners), Name Place Animal Thing (a fascinating game which increased my knowledge) and word ending (which could be played with normal words or with countries, places, etc). There was also the occasional rebel who used to run around the class and play indoor cricket with a few people he bullied.

Coming back to the topic, I wonder why people hate the rain nowadays. It makes life difficult in a couple of ways. It stops traffic, can cause power cuts (we didn’t have power for three days last year due to a storm) and generally make life hell. But isn’t that the wonderful part of rain, the fact that something as simple as water, can take you away from all these modern inventions and necessities and make you invent new (or recreate old) ways to entertain yourself?

I mean, last year, as I mentioned, we didn’t have power for three days. Terrible storm it was, it happened when I was out. I got wet obviously; I enjoy walking in the rain. Anyway, we didn’t have power, and so going online was ruled out, turning on the TV was ruled out. My source of music was cut off because the computer couldn’t be turned on. So what did I do, I called a friend over and we played scrabble. I practiced on my guitar more frequently. I wrote a couple of poems (about the rain, if you must know). And I also went for walks in the rain.

I love walking in the rain. It refreshes your senses and clears your thoughts. Of course, if you are walking in the rain, I recommend you wear three fourths or shorts. Do not wear jeans, the bottom will get dirty and it will just annoy you throughout your walk. Don’t wear sneakers, floaters are fine and preferably water proof ones. I mean the ones that don’t absorb water.

Walking in the rain in my opinion is the most effective way of relaxing. Especially in West Cochin, when it rains, it practically brings life to a stand still. So there’s very little traffic around, which is a good thing for your walks. No traffic, no noise, more time for thinking. Thinking about what you may ask. Anything, think about anything; The India US Nuclear Deal, the Railway Budget, your past, your future, your present or even why you like walking in the rain. For those who live in Kerala, if you haven’t tried it. Try it this monsoon.

While walking in the rain, you meet an occasional nut who will ask you why you’re walking in the rain and will suggest to a friend or relative that you are mentally unstable for walking in the rain. In Kerala, it is impossible for people to mind their own business. For example, yesterday mum looked out of the window and saw someone walking. The person looked like someone we knew, so mum thought it was him. The man came down the road leading to our place and mum shouts to dad “Just check if it is so and so.” It wasn’t so and so, it was probably some man walking to reduce his weight, something I might suggest to both mum and dad.

Anyway, the people who call you insane don’t worry about them. Just ignore them. They don’t know what they’re missing out on. What is better than walking in the rain is walking immediately after the rain, before the sun comes out? After the rain, there’s a beautiful smell that fills the earth. The smell supposedly attracts snakes, but I don’t care. I’m with the snakes on this one. The smell is heavenly.

For all those people who haven’t witnessed the Kerala Monsoon, I say, come down here and experience it. Its magnificent, it is beautiful. Do nothing other than stare at the rain falling down from the heavens.

I've been pretty busy since the last post. Sleeping consumes most of my time. Fascinating really, how much I can sleep. I think I can quite a bit. I mean, I sleep in the afternoon. Sleep in the morning (for about an hour or two) and sleep at night.

And yet, I feel sleepy. Plus, the television has decided to show good movies. Oscar Fever. What a time.. geez.

Coming to the reason why I should be kept away from the internet. THE BOARD EXAM *dun dun dun*

The Board Exam was devised as a way to equally assess all the school leaving students of India. Very noble thought. Obviously, if colleges looked at your school leaving marks, "certain" schools would do their best to give you the highest possible marks.

It is not equally assessing shit. There are three sets for each paper. Everyone knows that. Set A, Set B and Set C, but that okay, because the questions differing in each set are pretty much the same level.

Whats NOT fair, is that there are three different papers ENTIRELY. They're called "Foreign, Delhi and Outside Delhi" (There's also the Compartment for those who are interested). I've got this book that has question papers of the past 6 years. Of these, it has the Delhi Papers and the Outside Delhi papers and the Compartment ones.

It doesnt take a genius to figure out the fact that the Outside Delhi paper is tougher than the Delhi Paper. Then I wonder, why does Delhi have a paper to itself? Because its the capital of the country. I would like a paper for Kochi, because, say.. its the Queen of the Arabian Sea. If there any CBSE Personnel reading this, please leave a comment and tell me why Delhi gets a separate paper. Is it too exclusive to fall under the Outside Delhi Category?

Screw the fact that papers are different. Our exams are subject to the "Human Element", as they say in our Business Studies Textbook. Meaning, our answer scripts are corrected by Humans. What Fun. That means, they could be in a good (generous) or bad (stingy) mood. Depending on your luck, you get a good examiner or a bad examiner. I pray I get a good one :D. Doesnt everyone?

Our papers, one year of hardwork (okay, maybe one month, one week or one day) are tossed around in these huge sacks and carried around from place to place. Who's responsible for the loss/destruction of the answer script. What does the CBSE care if one answer script is lost/destroyed? What does anyone care.

I might be overreacting (as most people who have already written their boards will say), but I would like to know the answers to these questions


PS: Fulham lost to Man U
late winner by Cristiano Ronaldo. Matchwinner

And the reds go marching on…

After the away defeat to Arsenal, it was up to the Red Devils to prove that one defeat did not see them slip out of the game.

Did they do it in style or what? Consecutive 4-0 wins in the premiership against struggling side Watford (who cares) and Martin Jol’s Spurs at White Hart Lane.

The second one was what shut up critics (maybe not ALL of them). They played a first half that was smudged because of referee Mark Clattenburg’s decisions. He had a tough time from the first whistle. Scholes going in for a few rough tackles early on. It is difficult for referee’s to hand out cards that early in the game. It would set a standard to which they would have to abide throughout the game.

However, Clattenburg got a few crucial decisions wrong. Henrik Larsson was fouled in the penalty box and a penalty wasn’t awarded to United. Clattenburg wasn’t placed very well for making that decision, but that’s not an excuse. Its his job to be placed correctly.

United Captain Gary Neville, for reasons best known to him, grabbed on to Spurs defender Chimbonda as a free kick came into United’s penalty box. I underline CAPTAIN, because Neville shouldn’t resort to such methods to hold off his opponents. Would you see John Terry or Steven Gerrard do that? And Neville has more experience than either of them.

Now the third decision. Ronaldo is such a convincing actor that when he dived, Clattenburg was SURE he was fouled and awarded United a penalty! Ronaldo converted, put United up. 1-0 united.

Halftime

Second half and United win a corner. Now, John Terry is in my opinion the best header of the ball presently. There are only three people I think are capable of winning a header against Terry.

1) Peter Crouch – because of his sheer height

2) Fabio Cannavaro – On his day

3) Stand up.. Nemanja Vidic

The way Vidic attacks the ball as its flighted by Carrick is a sight. He sees Ronaldo go for the same ball and decides, no no, this is mine. It found the back of the net.

The third goal, Paul Scholes, perennial, nearly made a mess of it. He does his best to screw up but the ball says, oh hell, I’m going in!

After three goals, Spurs marking was way off. Their defence was in shamble. A fresh pair of legs come on in the form of Louis Saha and picks out Ryan Giggs with a fantastic through ball. Giggs has only Robinson to beat, and he finishes.

United did make a few mistakes towards the end. Ferdinand gave the ball away to Keane, fortunately Keane couldn’t convert.

I also found out what position John O’Shea plays best.

Glory Glory Man U?

Ask a Man United fan their prediction for this season and most will say “The Treble, again!”

The idea of Man U doing the treble seems laughable, even for me, a Man U fan (I would be really happy if they do pull off the treble). Football however unpredictable isn’t undecipherable.

Man U’s fixtures after the Christmas don’t seem too good. They have to play away games at Stamford Bridge, The Millennium Stadium, Anfield and Fratton Park. Yes, Fratton Park as well. Portsmouth will give Man U a good run for their money on their home ground, but I don’t see Man U not winning that. It’ll be a good game unless Portsmouth plays really badly.

Daunting Task : Stamford Bridge

Man U have already lost their home game to Arsenal. A goal by Emmanuel Adebayor (yes, one single solitary goal) sealing their fate. Arsenal haven’t yet lost at their new stadium, which isn’t good reading for Man U.


The home game against Chelsea was an “even Steven” game at 1-1. A costly error by full back Gabriel Heinze costing them 3 points, which allowed Ricardo Carvalho to head the ball in.

I may hate Chelsea for staying so close to Man U’s heels, but their master tactician, Jose Mourinho will never EVER let them lose a home game, especially one so crucial. So let us just assume Man U forfeits three points there.

Anfield is a fortress. Sure, Arsenal penetrated that fortress. However Jersey Dudek was keeping and I think that was what cost them. Rosicky’s goals seemed savable. Gerrard (Stevie G himself) didn’t go for the block. A piss poor performance by Liverpool that day, still they’re unbeaten at home in the premiership. Not good reading for Man U again.

Man U’s victories seem to depend on the man on fire. Stand up Cristiano Ronaldo. The game against Wigan was proof enough. I don’t think Wigan is exactly a weak team, nevertheless, the first eleven that Sir Alex played should have at least scrounged one goal. Yet they didn’t. SAF realizing his mistake, took off Darren Fletcher (I don’t know what he does to Man U’s attack, but obviously not very much) and brought on Ronaldo, who scored twice in that game (okay one was a penalty and Park may have scored if he wasn’t brought down).

Man of the Moment - Cristiano Ronaldo

Paul Scholes is another player who will have an impact on Man U’s performance this season (he has had an impact on their performance every season actually). If Scholes plays well, he controls Man U’s game (except for their tackling of course).

Man U’s previous game, the FA Cup fixture against Villa was close. I absolutely drooled over some of Henrik Larsson’s touches and moves, but something was missing. Paul Scholes didn’t play that match and Ronaldo seemed to be off touch. Something was missing about his game. Sure he ran in, ran out, crossed in, crossed out, step over, step under, step right, step left, blah blah blah, but still he lacked that magical touch of his (otherwise we would have seen him scoring, or at least creating a spectacular goal).

Perennial - Paul Scholes

Wayne Rooney was by far the most wasteful player of the game. He had many shots and didn’t capitalize even once. The only worthwhile thing he did was when he squared up Larsson for his shot. Rooney surely, is more a creative player than a finisher; his goal scoring record this season will prove that. I think that’s what happens when you play alongside Ruud Van Nistelrooy and Louis Saha, both of whom are deadly goal scorers.

Man U’s got a problem with their defence as well. Yes, Vidic is a fantastic find, nobody would deny it. He’s a threat from set pieces and brings about solidity to the defence as well. Lets just see who’s come on in if for example one of the defenders get injured or suspended (God forbid). Right back, we have JOHN O SHEA! Brilliance, what a dynamic player (sarcasm). Center Half we have WES BROWN (hmm..) and MIKAEL SILVESTRE (the most useless person to play Center Half, actually it’s a close call between him and Khalid Boulahrouz, and maybe even Boumsong, Bramble could also fall into this category).

The only good replacement they have in defence is in the left back position. Patrice Evra and Gabriel Heinze. Both are prone to mistakes. They’re not exactly brilliant Maldini standards or anything, but they’re good enough, come up with overlaps and stuff. Speaking of overlaps, its hard to tell whether Gary Neville is a midfielder a Right Forward or a Right back.

Total Football? Hardly.

Wanted - One Central Defender

Scratch my back and do it fast!

John Terry is Chelsea. And Chelsea's backbone depends on Terry's back. Normally, Chelsea's defence is impenetrable. It doesnt seem the same anymore. Chelsea have conceded 8 goals in their past 5 games against Everton, Wigan, Fulham, Reading and Villa. The Villa game being a 0-0 draw.

Chelsea scraped wins against Everton and Wigan. Everton conceded goals of a different class whereas against Wigan, Chelsea scored a late winner, Arjen Robben scoring a goal in injury time. Jose Mourinho stated after the Wigan game, "Father Christmas was very kind to us, we did not deserve to win"

Lets consider Chelsea's defensive options - John Terry (ruled out till 11th), Ricardo Carvalho (the only fit Centre Half), Khalid Boulahrouz (injured), Ashley Cole (fit), Paulo Ferreira (fit), Geremi (fit).

Out of this lets see who all can play the Central Postion. John Terry - out. Ricardo Carvalho - fit and according to Mourinho one of two players who are currently giving 100% while playing (the other being Didier Drogba, in case you're brain cells are dead) and your last option - Khalid Boulahrouz.

The Cannibal - Feeding off Scraps

I first saw "The Cannibal" play for Holland in the World Cup and I must admit he didnt impress me at all. He lacks focus, he commits unnecessary fouls and he's never on the right side of the forward. In a way, it may be good for him that he's injured, he can't embarass himself anymore in the position of Centre Half. Stick to Right Back and try to improve, Boula.

Interesting Point to note : Ricardo Carvalho is suspended for the next game (unsure source)

The transfer window is open and among other people, Sol Campbell and Matthew Upson are linked with Chelsea. Prices have sky rocketed, mainly because Chelsea has the dough and in the past were willing to pay fabulous prices for players who werent worth that much (yes, I'm talking about the Ukrainian). Mourinho said that he would rather play his 55 year old assistant instead of paying high prices. He may well have to.

Chelsea seems to be overcome with injury problems. Joe Cole is injured. Andriy Shevchenko went public and said that he would like to play for Milan on loan if Chelsea did not require him. Chelsea can use him actually. Make him play alongside Drogba and defenders will be too busy laughing at the 30 million man. Thats a 30 million joke!

Chelsea's board seems to have made it clear that Mourinho has to improve results or face the consequences.

Happy nooooo year ye odd lumps reading this!

Well.. 2006 passed like that.. yes .. exactly.. just like that.. and for those of you for whom it didnt pass like that, ye be lucky.

My moments of 2006
January - nothing.
February - nothing
March - Writing John's exams (eegh)
April - Nothing
May - John's results (yes.. my results)
June - #@%#$^W@#$^@$
July - Italy, The Headbutt and Head Boy moment
August - Turning 17
September - New Cousin
October - hmm
November - ohh yes november
December - argh!

My songs of 2006 (the ones i liked most, it may not be released in 06)

Most of Maiden's A Matter of Life and Death
Dream Theater - 6.00 and Under a Glass Moon
Funeral For a Friend - Roses for the Dead
Morrissey - Irish Blood, English Heart
Shakira - Hips Dont Lie
Herbert Gronemeyer - Celebrate the Day
Audioslave - Like a Stone
etc etc.


Happy new year again
I promise to post regularly.

In her Majesty's Secret Service






Granted, Daniel Craig is the most unlikely Bond (James Bond..to you) in the world. Lets inspect though, are you judging AFTER watching the movie or before? If you havent watched the movie yet, bang your head against a brick wall and hope to die.

I owe Daniel Craig an apology, though the chances that he is reading this is less than zero. Mr Craig, you have played Bond in the movie Casino Royale brilliantly. He is the most human bond. Susceptible to errors unlike the other Bonds we know who are suave, smart, sexy and never wrong.

This Bond, having just been promoted to "double O" (license to kill) status, is prone to mistakes. He gets himself caught on camera while blowing up an embassy and he also drinks poisoned martini. Not something you would catch Sean Connery or Pierce Brosnan or even Roger Moore doing, I'm sure.

Most of the movie revolves around a high stake poker game. The villain (no, not Daniel Craig) has invested a lot of money from terrorist organisations in the market and because our man Bond ruins his well thought of plan, he loses over 10 million. So this villainous chap decides to have a high stake poker game. Who wins? Does Bond hunt the man down after he wins the game or does Bond win the game?

Interestingly, Bond falls in love with a very interesting personality played by Eva Green. Another personality I never thought would find a place in a Bond movie, but obviously I was wrong.

Bond isnt the only one prone to error, the entire of MI6 is, as you will find out when you progress through the movie.

To Mr Craig : I'm sorry

To Movie goers : Get watching.

Draw two

Valentin Ivanov had quite an eventful game on 26th June (Indian Time). He played cards, deadly game for the players (*cough* football players). They of course suffered and acted and simulated and did everything they could to make the other team get more cards. The point of this game was to make the opposing team draw as many cards as they could and Ivanov was quite generous, handing out whenever he could.

Chelsea versus Barcelona, of course, you may wonder what I have for these sort of games. So I’ll tell you, nothing in particular. I thought Chelsea played decent football yesterday, and Barcelona still a shadow of their last year’s team. The game of course ended in a draw (2-2) with Drogba equalizing for Chelsea in the 93rd minute. Jose Mourinho for a second thought he had scored the goal and went in for a series of celebrations. Frank Rijkaard on the other hand just got furious with the officials decision to add on 6 minutes of injury time. I don’t blame him. If I were in his place I would have jumped down the referee and the fourth official’s throat (beg your pardon, I didn’t get the referee’s name thus far).

Referee’s are in the game to ensure smooth play. Not to stop the game when its building up at Central Midfield. Rough tackles happen in midfield, especially when clubs of the standard of Chelsea and Barcelona play. Both do their best to ensure a win for their club, even if it resorts to slightly unpleasant methods. When I talk about unpleasant methods, I’m not only talking about rough tackles, but also its direct opposite, simulation.

People regard Chelsea as a diver’s club more than a footballing one, but Barcelona seemed to have taken a couple of lessons from them with regard to yesterday’s match. Deco fell to the floor, supposedly injured and was writhing around when next second the ball was hit at him by someone (again, I forget who) and boom, he’s back on his feet and ready to fight.

The refereeing for yesterday’s game was bad, to say the least and piss poor in the extreme. Bad tackles went unpunished and good tackles were taken into the book. Carlos Puyol lifted his boot to the shoulder of a Chelsea player (cant remember who), which definitely should have been a yellow card, but nothing was given except a free kick to Chelsea. Ricardo Carvalho, inadvertently (perhaps), kicked fellow Portuguese player Deco in the thigh and got away with it, and this time, I don’t think Deco was acting.

Frank Lampard got a yellow card for walking. I kid you not, a (second) yellow card was supposed to be given to Ashley Cole, who would have headed for the showers had Frank Lampard not walked right in front of the referee and Cole. Luckily for Cole and unluckily for Lampard. Watching the replay, it was quite clear that the card was intended for Cole, but Lampard walks into the frame and screams something at someone (possibly a fellow player) and goes into the referee’s book.

Bravo Ref! I always wanted Chelsea to be looked into closely by the referee’s because of their talent for acting, led by Arjen Robben of course, the Olympic Diver. Robben is a powerful winger, and very easy to go to ground, even if there’s no contact. Thus far, I’ve never seen him go into the book for simulation. Didier Drogba happily elbowed a few Barcelona players yesterday. The referee called a few shots, but at all the wrong times. He didn’t nip arguments when it was required of him and he was not lenient on the softer tackles.

A case against Barcelona, young boy Lio Messi, comes into the spotlight, not out of the ordinary, but a piss poor way of making yourself famous. A fight erupted and both Chelsea and Barcelona players gathered round, no doubt passing death threats to one another, but Lio Messi goes one step further and tries to push Khalid Boulahrouz off his feet. Needless to say, he doesn’t succeed, Boulahrouz nearly being double his age and his size.

One bad decision by the ref is all that’s required to make the game go hay-way. If he penalizes someone for a soft tackle, he has set himself a standard. Any tackle on the same level or even a little rougher, has to be taken into account. The little rougher one’s going into the book for a yellow card and the “real rough” ones, which would have been a yellow card in any other game, would see red.

Ace referee Pierluigi Collina says it best, “We aren’t enemies. There are two teams playing and the role of the referee is to help them play better”.Till then, we see yellow and red.

Chelsea kills football

It took one moment of magic from Didier Drogba to seal the deal for Chelsea and European Champions Barcelona. Then again, for Chelsea, it always takes only one moment of brilliance isnt it, and its most always from Drogba.

The Ivory Coast international deceived Barca captain Carlos Puyol with a fantastic touch and slammed the ball into the back of the net, leaving no chance for Barca keeper Valdez.

One moment of brilliance, I was on the edge of my seat. And then the game settled to its normal pace, with Barca enjoying most of the possession, though not doing anything very productive with it. Barca played one of their worst games of football last night.

Chelsea didnt play very entertaining football either. Both played very mediocre football. Though the reason I lash out at Chelsea is because of this:

Chelsea is a team with a large number of attacking options. Midfielders like Arjen Robben, Michael Ballack and Frank Lampard are some of the biggest names in the world. Then why is it that Chelsea always seems to win on a 1-0 margin, unless they get free chances. Do they forget the fact that they have to attack and decide instead only to defend and keep the ball in midfield? Or is it because they feel they dont need to attack and leave their defence (a little) unprotected.

Chelsea, as far as I can tell, is not a team that needs to worry about their defence. Captain John Terry and the rest of the defensive company is assurance enough that the defence is well looked after. Petr Cech is by no means a bad goalkeeper, nor is Carlo Cudicini. Even Hilario, whom the papers took after, isnt a bad keeper. Claude Makelele does ALL the dirty work in

Makelele does the dirty work

midfield, wins crucial tackles, nips the attack of other teams in the bud. Then WHY cant Chelsea win with more than a 1-0 margin.

Didier Drogba and Andriy Shevchenko are a threat to any defence, even Italian, though the latter isnt troubling many defenders with Chelsea. Shevchenko is a 30+million waste at the moment. The Chelsea midfield cant provide enough through balls for him to survive on, a move to Arsenal would have made more sense, if Arsenal were willing to buy.

I'm pretty sure a time will come when Chelsea thinks they've won the game after scoring one goal, even if their opponents are two goals up. This would be playing in the team's mind :


Shevchenko signing up for a goal drought

"Oh well, thats our goal tally for the day, lets defend now"

Because of the absence of a youth system, I doubt Chelsea will last in the Premiership, especially when teams like Reading, Aston Villa, Tottenham Hotspurs and Everton are playing with so much passion.

Anyway.. so i realise i havent come to my own blog for a long time.. and now is the first time in about two months or so..
anyway.. i just gotta speak a few random words
i had to go for this Young World Quiz thing. so i went.. and you know.. im thinking there are gonna be chicks and all.. so i decide to wear my epaulets and my head boy badge and EVERYTHING and go to the place.

the place was DEVOID OF THEM. sorry if you were there and feel insulted.. but couldnt you MAKE YOUR PRESENCE FELT (OR SEEN)>?>??

I finished reading Shashi Tharoor's Five Dollar Smile.. I think its quite funny.. some of the stories.. i just love the way he captures the malayali mindset in some stories.. couple of things you ought to know if you come to kerala

Staple Food : Rice.. (yuck.. i suppose anyone would say that about their own respective staple foods)

Politics : The party who bribes the most wins.

Work: Laze around .. pretend to be important

Health: Okay.. not bad.. but any problems, blame the mosquitoes

Favourite Colours: RED

Ideology : Nobody knows the meaning

How to travel : Well, it would be better if you took a bus everywhere. But then you have to know how to tell the conductor the name of the stop correctly otherwise he would ask you a million times. Students get a concession on tickets, but only if they are in uniform on days the Government does not declare holidays. If you happen to be travelling on a day its not a holiday.. please pretend to ignore the conductor after you pay him the fare.

How to communicate: The people of Kerala are literate. They understand most languages, but that doesnt stop them from passing remarks if you dont speak Malayalam.

Favourite Sport : Politics, aside from that Football.

Reasons why I think Mathematics is female

1) It is unnecessarily complex
2) There are about a million ways to do the same problem, but NOT GET THE SOLUTION!
3) Women can multiply problems .. Mathematics has multiplication as well
4) Women can subtract money .. Mathematics has subtraction.
5) You never understand a thing a woman says.. its the same with maths
6) You cant live without maths.. you cant live without women either.

right
being 17 is no different from being 16. I know ive just experienced one day of this.. but its the same shit.. everyone wants to grow up.. be 17-18.. you LIVE THE SAME LIFE GOD DAMN IT.. the angel of money and parties isnt gonna come to you and say "look.. you're 17 now.. here.. you can have a credit card with infinite credit and party everyday while i look at your books and make you pasS"
NOOOOO
ok.. thats that
but otherwise.. it isnt that bad.. atleast you know you lived till youre 17/// i mean.. you know..

In an unprecedented move.. I have decided that I will stop listening to Iron Maiden.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! yeah right

anyway.. Ive been away almost the whole day I guess.. Its been kinda tiring.. but you know.. its better than sitting in the house and rotting.. and farting..

ive never been much of an outdoorsy person because i spent most of my life with my most favourite person in the world inside the house - the computer. so i had a childhood deprived of sports..

but ive started playing them now.. except for basketball in which i can barely pronounce the players names' let alone dribble the ball without committing one of the million fouls (doubling, shifting, violation etc etc) too many fouls to remember

thats the good thing about football.. if you're italian.. you can think that the ref wont see you elbow a player while jumping for the ball.. and when the guy falls down with blood coming from his face.. you can pretend innocence.. there are too few players in basketball to commit such a heinous crime.

or if you're french.. learning to headbutt your opponent is a good option. of course.. this can only be done if you're a world class player cited by many as the greatest player ever playing in your last game ever

anyone else will fail miserably (ie. they wont get caught)


Note: 200 people in the world dont know the meaning of headbutt.

there's a inverse relation between violence at home and marks at school

The greater the marks .. the less violence

Ok, so recently, in a shouting match, which involved a few things thrown at each other.. I am subdued. not too much.. but enough not to go for the Independence Day ball which was yesterday..

But its not like the I-Day ball would have been fun for me or anything.. not many people from school went.. I wouldnt have known many people.. plus I cant dance.

Its easy to say "Learn".. yea.. well its like telling an elephant to learn to dance.. okay.. i dont look ANYTHING like an elephant.. but im pretty sure an elephant and I could have a good dancing competition .. and he'd win..

I wasnt born to dance. I was born to headbang.. go in a wild frenzy.. banging my head (not literally).. around.. long hair (not yet) floating .. hitting other people in the face with that same long hair and then hearing them complain about the stinging.. yep.. thats what i was made for..

then the next day.. neck pain.

Hips dont lie - Shakira feat. Wyclef Jean

I dont know how much input came in from shakira.. i mean.. okay.. so the video has her shaking her butt and all.. wow.. quite nice.. etc etc..
has anyone noticed how much SINGING she actually does for the song? no.. welll.. she sings the chorus..

why the hell is the song called Shakira feat. Wyclef Jean then?? it should be Wyclef Jean (and a whole lot of other guys) feat Shakira..

nope.. its the other way around..

boom

songs are wierd.. so are bands
for example.. green day releases an album mocking the scene of pop today.. but they're mainstream shit.. now they cant sell without MTV !

contradictory

List of Sell Outs (in my opinion)
Ozzy
Kiss
Metallica
Green Day
Slayer

thats about it.. for now..

And we have exams.. tommorow is economics.. half of us dont know what these three million lines are going up and down a book.. i mean.. price increases demand decreases.. plot graph and shit like that.. rationale for P = MC

apparently "A decline in the total availability of food leads to widespread starvation and famines"
Gee whiz.. really?
Its like saying.. many many dogs involved in amorous acts will lead to an increase in the dog population.. like duh.. wake up

i mean how dumb can you get..
Amartya Sen wrote that.. and I could have written the same but nobody would have looked at it the same way!



Note : An increase in the users of internet will lead to an increase in the number of blogs



45% of people reading this are wasting their time.

So I recently joined Orkut.. and I realised its the greatest thing that happened to man after google.. i mean.. of course.. google and orkut are by the same people (google) .. I found so many people on Orkut.. and a hell of a lot of wierdos as well.. with a name like "Im off for 3 weeks" .. yea i pity the guy as well..
anyway the secret of orkut is donuts.. everyone knows that donuts are the source of power in orkut.. if you eat donuts in the morning then you can perform more on orkut (like determine who is gonna add you in the next 24 hours).. I know you guys didnt know that part.. I mean.. the god damn SERVER runs on donuts..

Bad Bad people.. no donut for you